{"product_id":"super-hoodie","title":"SUPER CALLOUS - HOODIE","description":"\u003ch2 data-path-to-node=\"3\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"3\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eA HEAVY MESSAGE FOR HEAVY TIMES\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"4\"\u003eI’ve never been a fan of musicals. Too much unprompted dancing. But when I heard that old song about the magical nanny, I couldn't help but notice the rhythm fit the current administration perfectly. I just had to fix the vocabulary. \"Supercalifragilistic\" is nonsense; \"Super Callous Fragile Racist\" is a news report.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"5\"\u003eThis hoodie is for the observer who has reached their limit. It’s for the days when the political atmosphere feels particularly thin-skinned and you just want to put the hood up and wait for logic to become trendy again. I’ve already done the work of distilling the last few years into a checklist; all you have to do is wear it and move with reason. Or don't move at all. I certainly won't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"6\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"6\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Sloth’s Comfort Clause:\u003c\/b\u003e I don’t do basic, thin hoodies. If I’m going to go through the effort of putting on sleeves, the quality has to justify the energy. This is a \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"6\" data-index-in-node=\"170\"\u003e9 oz. midweight fleece\u003c\/b\u003e—a sturdy 80\/20 cotton\/poly blend that feels substantial. It’s \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"6\" data-index-in-node=\"255\"\u003epigment-dyed\u003c\/b\u003e, which gives the fabric a vintage, lived-in character. Just like the political \"values\" we're currently rehashing, each one is slightly different and full of unique variations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7\"\u003eWe didn't just stop at the print. This features a \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7\" data-index-in-node=\"50\"\u003ejersey-lined hood\u003c\/b\u003e, split-stitch double-needle seams for durability, and a smooth ring-spun cotton face. It’s finished with my \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7\" data-index-in-node=\"176\"\u003esewn-on woven labels\u003c\/b\u003e and a \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7\" data-index-in-node=\"203\"\u003ecustom print inside the hood\u003c\/b\u003e. It’s the kind of detail that matters to people who actually pay attention to the fine print.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-path-to-node=\"8\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"8\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Stats:\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-path-to-node=\"9\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"9,0,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"9,0,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Checklist:\u003c\/b\u003e Super, Callous, Fragile, Racist, Sexist, Lying, POTUS. Still accurate. Still exhausting.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"9,1,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"9,1,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Palette:\u003c\/b\u003e Pigment Slate Blue and Pigment Black. (The colors of a bruised ego and a dark sense of humor.)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"9,2,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"9,2,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Build:\u003c\/b\u003e 9 oz. Midweight Fleece. Standard unisex fit. 1x1 ribbing at the cuffs and waistband so it stays put while you’re doing nothing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"9,3,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"9,3,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Signature:\u003c\/b\u003e Custom interior hood print and woven 9 Toed Sloth labels.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"9,4,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"9,4,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Ethos:\u003c\/b\u003e This product is only made when you order it. We don't believe in wasting resources or energy on overproduction. Expect it to take about a week to be crafted—perfection shouldn't be rushed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Apliiq","offers":[{"title":"Pigment Slate Blue \/ s","offer_id":46955476484249,"sku":"APQ-5821287S6A1","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Slate Blue \/ m","offer_id":46955476517017,"sku":"APQ-5821287S7A1","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Slate Blue \/ l","offer_id":46955476549785,"sku":"APQ-5821287S8A1","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Slate Blue \/ xl","offer_id":46955476582553,"sku":"APQ-5821287S1A1","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Slate Blue \/ xxl","offer_id":46955476615321,"sku":"APQ-5821287S2A1","price":67.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Slate Blue \/ xxxl","offer_id":46955476648089,"sku":"APQ-5821287S21A1","price":69.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Black \/ s","offer_id":46955476680857,"sku":"APQ-5821288S6A1","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Black \/ m","offer_id":46955476713625,"sku":"APQ-5821288S7A1","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Black \/ l","offer_id":46955476746393,"sku":"APQ-5821288S8A1","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Black \/ xl","offer_id":46955476779161,"sku":"APQ-5821288S1A1","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Black \/ xxl","offer_id":46955476811929,"sku":"APQ-5821288S2A1","price":67.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pigment Black \/ xxxl","offer_id":46955476844697,"sku":"APQ-5821288S21A1","price":69.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0421\/5396\/7769\/files\/Callous-Hoodie-Grey.jpg?v=1776287301","url":"https:\/\/9toedsloth.com\/products\/super-hoodie","provider":"9 TOED SLOTH","version":"1.0","type":"link"}